Is this it?

That’s the first question I ask myself when I think about Roorkee now. I know the answer to it, and so does everyone around me. But I don’t think I am ready to hear it just yet. And why would I? Why would I ever want to say goodbye to Roorkee when it was a never-ending source of joy, despair and everything in between. And why would I ever want to say goodbye to Roorkee when it gave me people and memories that I’ll treasure for a lifetime.

A saga that started starry-eyed on 19^th July 2018, ended teary-eyed on 13^th May 2022. The 1,394 days in between taught me who I was, what life is, and what I wanted to become. And I am under no illusion, even retrospectively, that my 1394 days were all jolly and happy. They absolutely weren’t. I have had many sleepless nights, stressful presentations, and nauseous episodes because of the said pressure. But if you want to know, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Again, why would I? Would I want to forego these experiences and not know who’d help me through this and in process build a bond that’ll stand the test of time? Or would I want to forego these low-lows and be unable to fully appreciate and enjoy the elation that the highs provided?

The beauty of my college experience, wasn’t in the n number of trips I have been on or in the events that I have participated in, it was in the endless conversations I had in G-87 and G-67. It was in the nightly walks I went on around the main building. It was in the horrifying number of hours I spent in the paneer line at my mess and equally disturbing number of hours I spent in G-88 eating lays and discussing life, while bitching about people. I’ll always hold a grudge against the COVID though, for stealing 2 years of what-ifs and what-could’ve-beens. But deep down I know what I would’ve done those two years too. Spend some more time ranting about professors and workload at G-91, or spend some more time listening to DSP and Thaman songs at Ravindra. These small things might not seem exciting or spectacular, but this along with a pizza and a football match, or an F1 race on a Sunday evening was what my college was about. And I am all the better for it.

My time at Roorkee was wildly different than what I thought it would be before I entered the gates. But as write this down, I can safely say that it gave me an experience that I required. Roorkee took me down a path where I discovered my love for Quizzing, my knack for making new friends, my dislike for politics and my absolute hatred for 8am classes (Honestly, just remove them. This I definitely won’t miss). It also showed me how to handle heartbreaks, strike up a conversation with security guard for life advice, function on no sleep for 4 days and cram an entire semester worth of syllabus into my brain, in a night. This coupled with the sense of relief after completing an exam and eating disappointment disguised as food in the mess, is a formative exercise in character building I suggest everyone to try at least once. Yes, academics are what we came here for, but it is probably the least rewarding thing you get in Roorkee. Not that it is bad or lackluster, but it pales in comparison with the other activities we get up to.

And hence I ask again, am I wrong in not wanting this beautiful chapter to end? No.

But right now, all I can say is…. Thank you and Goodbye.

Love always,
Agastya.